Can it really be true that Thanksgiving is only a little over a week away? It seems like I was just recently leisurely browsing recipes, idly considering new ideas for our Thanksgiving dinner. And now, here it is almost on top of me, and I'd better get it together. This year really snuck up on me.
I feel like my life is getting crazier by the day, and yet at the end of every week or even weekend, I can barely remember what I did. Life is moving fast these days, and I'm not so sure I like it. I've lost/am losing the luxury of free time. Every minute away from work is jam-packed with things I need to do. And I never get to half of them, so they become just good intentions. And you know what the road to hell is paved with...
Here are the thoughts and worries that fly through my brain on most days (in no particular order):
1. My daughter all alone in Mesa with her two daughters while her husband is in Savannah on rotations. At least the baby has gotten some relief for what turned out to be allergies, and is now sleeping most, if not all of the night. But now Katie threw her back out and is in a lot of pain. I want to help, but how??
2. What to get everyone for Christmas. I've done almost no shopping, and the idea of going to a mall makes me want to cry. I need to buckle down, make some decisions, and fire up the internet.
3. How to make Christmas an easier day. I get so wound up trying to make everyone happy that I'm just about done in. L and I have a blended family that isn't always so blended. Its getting better with time, but I wish everyone could just relax, chill, and enjoy everyone for who they are. I like all different kinds of people, and I don't understand why this is so hard, but then - the holidays are nothing if not emotional. *sigh* I always want the picture perfect holiday, and so far its been elusive. I like holidays with lots of family and talking and visiting, and L likes holidays with lots of alone time. See? We're a match made in heaven. But really - he understands me better than anyone, and I totally get him - we just have opposite socializing requirements. We'll work it out.
4. How to get myself thinner. Okay, this is trivial, but it has a lot to do with how I feel about myself. I have a sneaking suspicion that I wouldn't spend half what I do on clothes and skincare if I were more happy with my body. For some reason I always think that a new pair of pants will make me look better. And they do... for a day. And then I'm stuck with me again.
5. How to fit in visiting my grandma, doing my VT, finishing my painting projects, and maybe sneaking a good book in, along with a regular exercise routine when I don't get home from work before 6pm and I need to be in bed by 10? (So, consequently I don't usually get to bed before 11 so as the week progresses I become a hot mess because I'm sleep deprived. AND I still don't get all of those things in.)
My friends, I could go on and on but then you'd know how nuts I really am, if you don't already. I'm having a hard time not having enough time for things I really want and need to do. Add in the holidays, and it's a recipe for emotional craziness. We're all busy, I know, so how do most of you cope with too much to do? I used to not be so busy at work, so I could do a little online shopping during the day, or balance my checkbook or plan a menu. But lately it's been so annoying - my 8 hours are actually filled with work. I hate when that happens.
I think what I'm experiencing is a little pre-holiday jitters. Once I plunge in and start getting things done, plans start falling into place. I just feel a little ambushed right now. Not prepared. But I'm looking forward to having Scott and Ashley over for Thanksgiving. Ash and I had a great night last week shopping for makeup at Sephora. (They were having a 20% off your purchase night!) We reality checked each other's spending. We were good shopping buddies AND we discovered the best mascara anywhere. (Givenchy - the wand is shaped like a little spiky ball and makes your eyelashes just stunning) Afterwards we grabbed a bite to eat and she announced that she was going to bring green bean casserole to Thanksgiving dinner. My favorite. Suddenly I felt like I wasn't in this feast dinner all by myself. Someone was going to bring the veggies.
So these have been the topics banging around in my head the last few days. Nothing more entertaining than that. Just raw life in all it's randomness. It's 10:10. Past my bedtime. The day went so quickly. Again.